Ardakh Nurgaz. Dark
'Selves are a dialogue'
---Hölderlin
Completely destroyed
I have a body like a hollow cave
that will ring with a bellowing sound of thousands of years when a stone is thrown in
the lower ground seems a dryland with no leaping birds
when the tongue touches the stone, it turns into a stone
over the deserted street come flying countless butterflies
like ghosts that fly out of the urns ruined yesterday
the animals, let out for fresh air and having given up ploughing the field, are digging the history
until it's faceless
the overbearing ones are making a continuous noise
each time the candle flame changes its face a moth turns into ashes
Black night, black skies, a star, out of countless stars, is lit and slides across the night sky
I've seen you lit up and sliding. But I didn't see the end of the ashes
like the language on the tip of the tongue, burning, illuminating, disappearing, merged inside the
body
till one knows not where it's gone
except that you are somewhere inside my inner world
and that you've slid across the night sky, burning and, having smashed the quietness and silence
of the darkness, ending up merging into me
Dark night, I imagine you ripping your black sky apart
I'd like to see your face, eyes, pupils, cheeks, anntenna and body, all in the darkness
sucking the thrilling body odour, like the smells from the dryland of your body
and touching your fingers, your features, your forehead and your hair
You are right inside me
But who are you? Who am I?
the world can't be there just because it is seen
if there is a beginning, there will be an end
where am I rushing to?
I can't feel, imagining all the past centuries...
centuries are time, centuries may not be time
centuries are mountains that have sunken onto a flat bottom
are waves that rose when the meteor burned out after sliding across the black sky
waves, your kisses, breathings, wars, destructions, driftings, facing the hidden fate every minute
impossible for you to take hold of the abyss
she is time, a gentle voice, a silver earring lost in the cluster of reeds
is language, the sound of bells before prayers, a drop of water that leapt before disappearing in
the puddle, silence that illuminated the darkness and merged into it
Why does it always happen in the evening and dawn when Ihanker after the initial light?
Every time I wake up, I am in a dream
when the tide is rising, with the clean water and silver pearls on the wave, and the bluish colour
creeping unto the bank
I am there
the black continent, your body has my footsteps
when the waves invade the beach and the land is opened up by the footsteps, the history written
into your body will be me
that is love, hate, jealousy, self-blame, contempt, greed, abjectness
is a final descent of oneself as a competitor, creating an eternal Other
and when I begin at your bank my footsteps are dim, blurry, dark, hidden ditches and rapids
everywhere
even if with the fire, with a lit candle in hand, my features are still too dark to be recognized for
you
(Note: '...Man has experienced much. Selves are a dialogue and can listen to each other, which is why deities can be named,' quoted from Heidegger: Hölderlin and the Essence of Poetry.
Written in Kazakh by Ardakh Nurgaz
Translated into Chinese by Gulnar Akhan
Translated from the Chinese by Ouyang Yu
Enclosure:
1. 阿尔达克·努尔哈兹：暗
http://miniyuan.com/read.php?
2. A night at the theatre
https://www.eurekastreet.com.au/article/a-night-at-the-theatre
3. DOLLS IN THE SKY OVER THE CITY
HTTPS://WWW.ANGIME.COM/ARDAK-RAZBOYNIK-ENG
4. 5 Poems by Ардак НУРГАЗЫ in English, Chinese and Kazakh
http://cordite.org.au/translations/yu-nurgaz/
5. Ardakh Nurgaz. Dolls in the Sky over the City
https://thebilge.kz/e/action/ShowInfo.php?classid=33&id=3673